90kms later - I survived the Gong Ride

At 6am my alarm clock rudely disturbed me from my slumber. Rather bleary-eyed and struggling to remember why the hell my alarm was ringing at 6am, I managed to drag myself out of bed. This seemed very unpleasant at the time but was nothing compared to what I was to experience over the rest of this day.

7:15am was the kick-off time for Team Goldmuff - through the throngs of cyclists all with their trusty steeds we managed to get riding by about 7:30am. Unusually for sunny Sydney, it was a cloudy morning but we were happy with this as blistering heat is not good when you have 90km of serious mountain to conquer.
The first 40km were not too bad and we were trundling along at a good pace. At this point Hayley saw sense and decided she had had enough - she took the train back to Sydney (knee-injury induced realism played a part in this decision making). I stubbornly decided to pedal on, spurred by the thoughts of all the donations I had generously received and not wanting to let my believers down.


This was where the mountains began. No amount of riding could have prepared my vag for what it was about to endure. Serious saddle chaffing was beginning to set in and I was having thoughts that I would never experience the pleasures of the flesh again. Again, your words of encouragement were ringing in my ears and I persevered on.

This was about the time that the gales started. Not only were there 70 degree inclines, there were 70 degree inclines with a gale-force wind blowing in my face. I grimaced (not a good look) and obstinately continued onward. The views, I must say, were amazing but the sand blowing in my face slightly hindered my enjoyment of them.

I thought that once the mountains were over it was gonna be plain-sailing all the way to Wollongong. Not the case. The last 25km were probably the toughest. All-in-all, I survived mountains, winds, saddle-chaffing and vaginal pressure and have lived to tell the tale.

Thanks again to all those who sponsored me - you are a generous bunch. And thanks for your kind words of encouragement - they helped me in my hours of darkness.